Making Room for Love

Space Cat Adventures

This story could be named The Long Arm of the Paw.

My cat is opening a door in my heart. Nearly every night, SpaceCat watches me as I type on my laptop in bed, catching up on work emails or writing. He eyes me to watch for the signs. Is she horizontal, has the big back cushion been tossed to the floor? When he sees the signs, he gets up, and walks purposely up to the pillow. Then he circles this way and that until he can find a position that he likes, curled around my head. 

For years this bothered me. I was not used to having so much fur next to my face. Then my pre-menopausal body heated up to such a degree I would bolt out of bed and run to the guest bedroom and slip onto that cool, cool pillow. We had falling out last year—my running away at night and continuous laptop focus hurt his feelings and made him feel neglected. It took many months of intentional attention to earn back his trust.

Now, I notice how much he just wants to Love Me.

When he finds his position, then its my turn to adjust. But now instead of shielding myself from him, I make sure I have another hand out touching his body so he knows he is part of my “shape”.  Sometimes, I gently bring out a second pillow for my head. Either way when the adjustment dance is done, he Always finds a way to put at least one paw on my shoulder, and his face nestled next to my face. Its the most incredible act. This constance little presence at the end of a day letting me know how much I matter. 

I don’t know that I’ve experienced this kind of Love before. What’s eye opening is the extent to which I deprioritized it. Letting love in means making room on a shared pillow. It means little gestures to let the other Being know you care for them even if you adjust. Now…now I am learning. In the quiet of the night, while my husband is slumbering, I lean my head towards the ball of fur who insists on being so Willful about caring for me. 

We must, simply LET.LOVE.IN.