Poetic Revelations: Chunky Boots

Fire and Ease

“What fire do we feed? What fire do we put out?”
—Mark Nepo, The Fire of Aliveness

This is a weekly publication for heart-centered warriors, swimming through this thing called life with an intact, open heart (and voice).

SELECTED POEMS

• Things Carried Through the Fire, Mark Nepo

• Fire, Judy Sorum Brown

Dear Embodied Hearts and Dancing Souls,

Taking a moment to remember the grief and terror of everyone with loved ones in Gaza. If you have space in your body, I invite you to take a deep breath into and from your heart, and simply send your whole body light and love to them.

Chunky Boots. Once, about 20 years ago, a much younger me was walking along a narrow street in Rome. I looked up and saw a store window with a mannequin wearing a long, sleek mauve-ish colored gown, all the way down to the floor. It was the shape of the gown (the fabric did not have much embellishment; it spoke for itself) that first caught my eye. More form fitting than not, it hung pleasingly long to the knees, until gradually, and ever so casually, it seemed to find flare closer to the bottom. It was both casual and feminine all at once.

And thats when I saw them. These chunky urban black boots. They had dressed the mannequin so it appeared as if she was hitching up the skirt.  I had never seen thick boots paired with a formal gown before. The way the dress formed a casual pool around the black chuny boots… exuded the feeling that this woman felt entirely Free to be herself, choose according to Her preferences and priorities, and walk on her own two feet. 

I looked up above the window to see the store name displayed. Chanel, it said. Whoa, I thought, maybe there is something more to these fancy fashion houses than I imagined. I took photos of the mannequin with my 35mm camera and walked on. The song “These Boots were made for Walking” immediately sprang to mind.

I chuckle now thinking of this: mannequin as role model.

Shit Kickers. In NYC last weekend, I noticed the chunky boot was the footwear of choice of nearly all native NY women everywhere (with everything). Again I loved the solidity these women exuded. The boots seem to say: I’m here, and you’re going to have to deal with me.

In the weekly playgroup I participate in, another woman reads us a poem she had just written about her new shoes. My “shit kickers” she called them. She holds up a pair of chunky boots and proceeds to read a protest poem regarding the current war. See, its a thing.

In my own body, I am feeling a fire I haven’t felt for a long time. Coming of age, I had a fierce determination in my body to leave my home situation. The fuel in my body was a drive to get away from it. But today, the fire rising wants to drive me towards something.

Mark Nepo talks about how one of our continual jobs as human beings is to discern between the fire of life that rejeuvenates us and the fire of circumstances that drain us. He says our job is to feed the first fire and douse the second.

We need this discernment daily, he says. We get to help each other discern one from the other. I appreciate that, after nearly four months of creative rest, my body has a natural way of telling me that its time to get on with things again. 

Fire and Ease.  There is another sign too. Two weeks ago one of my teachers who can read our energetic holograms told me I was “so” on my path. I sighed. I couldn’t see it.

And yet…this weekend I co-led a full day of InterPlay in person. Two sequences flowed from my body to my fingertips into a Google file. When I picked up the notes from the printer that morning, there wasn’t any nervousness in my body. I felt…surprisingly unburdened. No prolonged worry, rehearsing, or rehashing. My morning was simple, filled with routine tasks like filling my water bottle, packing my tote-bag.

Once there, I let the instructions exude from me effortlessly. People had rich and fertile experiences. I expanded their envelope of what was possible. I could not have predicted how supported I felt by my co-lead, or how impressed I felt by her leading style. Our sequences complimented and built on each other in sweet, surprising walys.

Notice how much lighter this whole experience was for me. Yes, I love creating playful, thoughtful sequences for people to have more of their human experience. But this time, I had to admit…. this is Mine. I don’t feel afraid to say: I am made for this.

Staying vulnerable, noticing, letting life affirm me, letting Big Love win amidst the challenges has gotten me here. I am ready to feed my Fire of Aliveness. I am willing to Thrust, Leap, or Stomp my way to my next Landing point to stand up this practice more fully in my life.

Which I why I must get myself a pair of chunky boots.

As soon as I make this decision, I notice an online article informing me Doc Martens has just opened its only store in my state - a few miles away from me. A sign I’m on my path.

Stay #heartwoke. To your exquisite unfolding,

Monisha

---

---

NOTES:

1. There is Dance Chapel tonight (11-7-2023)!